Showing results by author "Bernice Bloom" in All Categories

All hail the magnificent Mary Brown! She is funny, gorgeous, and bonkers and here she is in a box set for the first time. "Mary Brown is Bridget Jones on fire! This is modern, fresh and SO FUNNY!" When we meet Mary she is heavily overweight. When she realises that she can't cross her legs and has trouble bending over to tie her shoelaces without wheezing like an elderly chain-smoker, it's time to take action. So, one rainy day, she puts down her pizza and heads off to Fat Club, where she flirts, causes mayhem, and celebrates every pound lost with a huge glass of wine. The friends she ...

Get ready for a wild ride with Rosie Brown, the sassy sixty-something determined to show the world that age is just a number. Her mission to take control of her life begins when she gets out of bed and realises that every part of her is starting to creak. All she's done is lie down for eight hours, but she has the sort of neck pain that a younger person would associate with severe whiplash from a multi-car pile-up. There are so many clicks and clacks from her creaking joints it sounds like someone’s knitting next to her as she walks. Serenaded by knitting needles when she used to be ...

Mary Brown, our fabulous, full-figured heroine, is off on safari with an old school friend. What could possibly go wrong? Lots of things, it turns out. Mary starts off on the wrong foot by turning up dressed in a ribbon-bedecked bonnet, having channeled Meryl Streep from Out of Africa. She falls in lust with a khaki-clad ranger half her age and ends up stuck in a tree wearing nothing but her knickers while sandwiched between two inquisitive baboons.

Mary Brown receives an invitation to a funeral. But she has absolutely no idea who the deceased is. She’s told that he invited her on his deathbed, and he’s very keen for her to attend, so she heads off to a dilapidated old farmhouse in a remote part of Wales. When she gets there she discovers that only five other people have been invited to the funeral. None of them know who he is either.

THREE wonderful mystery books from the best-selling comedy writer Bernice Bloom. Including: Mysterious Invitation... SIX STRANGERS RECEIVE INVITATIONS TO A FUNERAL They are told that the deceased – a man called Reginald Charters – invited them on his deathbed. But who on earth is Reginald Charters? And why was he so desperate to have these six people at his funeral? The group of six strangers is told that they have 20 hours to figure out why they have been invited to the funeral. If they can do so, they will inherit a million pounds. So, they start talking. But it's complicated. Not ...

Mary Brown is funny, gorgeous, and bonkers. She's also about six stone overweight. When she realises she can't cross her legs, has trouble bending over to tie her shoelaces without wheezing like an elderly chain-smoker, and discovers even her hands and feet look fat, it's time to take action. But what action? She's tried every diet under the sun. This is the hysterical story of what happens when Mary joins "Fat Club", where she meets a cast of funny characters and one particular man who catches her eye.

Hooray, it's Christmas! It's the Adorable Fat Girl's favorite time of year, and she embraces it with the sort of thrill and excitement normally reserved for toddlers seeing jelly tots. Our funny, gorgeous, and bonkers heroine finds herself dancing from party to party, covered in tinsel, decorating the Beckhams' Christmas tree, dressing up as Father Christmas, declaring live on This Morning that she's a drug addict and enjoying two Christmas lunches in quick succession. She's the party queen as she stumbles wildly from disaster to disaster....

Mary Brown is the star of the Adorable Fat Girl series. She's funny, gorgeous, and bonkers, and when the series starts, she's seriously overweight. She heads for Fat Club and slowly starts to lose weight. The novels tell the tales of the fun she has and the people she meets as she battles the pounds. As well as having a crazy amount of fun, she also loses weight...a massive 40 pounds! How did she do it? Here in this audiobook - for the first time - she describes the rules that helped her. Also included are the stories of readers who have written in to share their weight loss stories.

Mary Brown is funny, gorgeous, and bonkers. She's also about 50lbs overweight. When she realises that she can't cross her legs and has trouble bending over to tie her shoelaces without wheezing like an elderly chain-smoker, it's time to take action. So, one rainy day she puts down her pizza and heads off to Fat Club, where she flirts, causes mayhem, and celebrates every pound lost with a huge glass of wine.

Hooray, it's Christmas! Mary Brown's favorite time of year, and she embraces it with the sort of thrill and excitement normally reserved for toddlers seeing jelly tots. Our funny, gorgeous, and bonkers heroine finds herself dancing from party to party, covered in tinsel, decorating the Beckhams' Christmas tree, dressing up as Father Christmas, declaring live on This Morning that she's a drug addict, and enjoying two Christmas lunches in quick succession.

A chance meeting with an old school friend sends Mary Brown off on three fabulous adventures. First, it’s to a safari in South Africa. She arrives dressed like Meryl Streep in Out of Africa and ends the trip stuck in a tree wearing nothing but her knickers.

Mary Brown is in lockdown. She’s all nothing for weeks, and is living on a diet of cake and wine. She’s really up before midday and spends her time eating every box that she can get her hands on. Then, she has an idea.... Instead of just eating the cake, why doesn’t she judge it? She should organize a World Cup of cakes. With Juan, her trusty sidekick, she sets up the competition with meticulous detail, and the whole thing goes viral. Featuring: home dyed hair, talking to potatoes, internet shopping, and birdwatching. And loads of cake.

Mary Brown is the star of the Adorable Fat Girl series: she's gorgeous, curvaceous, and wants to find a boyfriend. But where's she going to meet someone new? She doesn't want to hang around pubs all evening (actually that bit's not true), and she doesn't want to have to get out of her pyjamas unless really necessary (that bit's true). There's only one thing for it - she will launch herself majestically onto the dating scene.

Mary Brown is back to her mad and crazy best as she heads to Portugal for a weight loss camp and discovers it’s nothing like she expected. Mary wants to hide from the instructors and cheat the system. The trouble is, her mum is with her, and won’t leave her alone for a second...Then there's the angry instructor with the deep, dark secret about why he left the army. And what about Yvonne - the slim, attractive lady who sneaks off every night after dinner. Where's she going?

The adorable fat girl needs to do something to get fit, so she tries yoga. She signs up for a weekend retreat, packs up assorted snacks, and heads for the countryside to get in touch with her chi and her third eye. And that's when it all goes wrong. Featuring frantic chickens, an unexpected mud bath, men in loose-fitting shorts and no pants, calamitous headstands, a bizarre new friendship with a yoga guru, and a quick hospital trip.

SIX STRANGERS RECEIVE INVITATIONS TO A FUNERAL They are told that the deceased – a man called Reginald Charters – invited them on his deathbed. But who on earth is Reginald Charters? And why was he so desperate to have these six people at his funeral? “It’s a mystery worthy of Agatha Christie” The group of six strangers are told that they have 20 hours to work out why they have been invited to the funeral. If they can work it out, they will inherit a million pounds. So, they start talking. But it's complicated. Not everything is as it seems. More clues arrive, but they struggle to...

Mary Brown notices the man watching her. There's something familiar about him. Who is he? He seems to be following her. What does he want? He knows things he shouldn't know. Mary Brown is concerned and confused. Then her baby is stolen... While a police team search for her missing girl and reporters gather outside the hospital, Mary and Ted must confront the unthinkable: their baby girl is missing, and they have no idea who took her or why. With each passing hour, Mary grows more desperate to find her baby while navigating the exhausting challenges of postpartum life. The book is a ...

For readers who enjoy laugh-out-loud moments, a splattering of romance and one quite magnificent heroine. Mary Brown is back in box set format for the third time. In BOX SET THREE of her fabulously funny novels, follow Mary Brown in 'A Friend in Need' as she goes chasing around the country to find out whether Charlie's boyfriend is being faithful to her, then join her for 'Dog Days' as she gets herself a puppy and integrates herself into the dog walking community. Then...it's 'Don't Mention the Hen Weekend' as Mary goes off on a hen weekend like no other (spoiler alert - they end up in jail...

A wonderful new novel from the No.1 bestselling author Bernice Bloom DON'T MENTION THE HEN WEEKEND! ‘A great new adventure with the magnificent Mary Brown. What a splendid read!’ 'It's always a time for celebration when a new novel from Bernice Bloom arrives. This one is wonderful.' Mary Brown is getting married. She’s overjoyed and under-prepared, but that won’t stop her from heading off for a hen weekend with five of her best friends. They head to Crete to enjoy the sunshine, friendship, wine, and parties. What could possibly go wrong? A lot, it would seem… Their Sound of Music ...

"We'll Always Have Paris" - The latest laugh-out-loud adventure from million-selling comedy writer Bernice Bloom! Buckle up for a hilarious Parisian escapade with Mary Brown and her mother, Rosie, as they celebrate Rosie's 60th birthday in the City of Love. Armed with just three words of French and big dreams of Parisian glamour, this mother-daughter duo is in for the surprise of their lives! What starts as a simple birthday getaway quickly spirals into a whirlwind of family secrets, outrageous mishaps, and unforgettable encounters. Picture this: A "Save the Badger" parade down the Champs-...