Showing results by author "Adrian Gabriel Dumitru" in All Categories

I meditate. I think a lot. I've became addicted to it. It's sort of an obsession. ... looking also as an addiction. I study the concept of illusory, but no matter what i always end up into the illusion. Feeling without a compass. Not ... just lost. ... but extremely lost. Of course ... all was induced of the fact that ... i had realised that no matter what direction i might follow ... all was the opposite of what i've wanted ... and actually a pathless path. So ... yeah ... i am the profile experiencing life as a disappointment ... but paradoxically still suffering of this incurable disease...

I wake up every single morning disliking reality. Or better said ... my reality. I open my eyes ... saying ... "Not again!" ... really disliking a new day is starting. Actually ... to make myself better understood ... i feel all as a drama. Being extremely intense. Feeling annoyed. Frustrated. Sad ... and then when i finally accept i can't really change anything at all ... depressed. Also ... hopeless. And even after reading and meditating a lot ... then analysing my thoughts and feelings one million times ... realising it's all an illusion ... i still can't redefine my attitude. I am ...

Still dreaming to be free If you ask a school boy about the ideal life ... that is one without homework and very long vacations. The summer vacation is the ideal time for them ... but still one day the autumn is coming. If you ask an employe in a corporation about the ideal life ... he will say that he would love as the working week to have 2 days of work a day instead of 5. The school boy, no matter the age ... is not feeling free. Years ago ... when he was not in school ... he felt the freedom of doing only what he wanted to do. The employee from the corporation, even if he knows that he ...

Maybe life is too short to waste it with … useless things. Maybe it’s time to start meditating more. To analyze our behavior … but also the one of the people around us. To pay attention to the impact of influences over our lives … but also on the lives of others. Understand that … domination … no matter of its character… positive or negative …. It’s a concept that we should not allow it to become real. And we should also be aware of how a simple small influence … that is repeated on and on and on … could become … dominance …. without even realizing.

I write as a form of self therapy ... always trying to heal my soul. Feeling ... so, so many times that I'm hurt and experience a terrible pain. Knowing everything. Feeling it so deeply. Coming up with so many logical explanations ... but not really doing anything to save myself for real. Yes ... I know it's all toxic. I know that i've ruined myself since i am with her ... but i still allow as the nonsense to continue. She's abusing of me. She's daily provoking me ... till a point when i become a real devil ... torturing her ... like she never experienced before. So ... we allow all to ...

The contemporary woman ... no matter who she really is ... has a tremendous need of being treated as a princess. Understanding this fact ... is probably one of the most important rules into a relationship. I mean ... understanding and accepting it. On the other hand .... not realising this need ... is almost ... a catastrophe. The same person we loved ... and loved us so much ... into one point simple start to act with us ... horrible ... being a bitch. And ... believing there is absolutely no explanation ... for such a change of behaviour ... we continue life together ... having a ...

What is the non sense? What is behind it? What is hided in the things that makes no sense at all?! Why we have them in our lives?! Who’s responsible of generating that?! Are we attracting the non sense ... or we are the ones behind the creation of it?! Should we accept it ... or simple smile in front of it ... and actually understand that the non sense itself is the expression of the fact that we are on a journey on a pathless path?! Lots of question ... and maybe no real answer. Or maybe lots of answers ... but none of them is satisfying us. I was reading tons of books ... with the hope ...

His love Her fantasy ... understanding what love is about As a man, but also as a woman, we try to define the undefined from a love story. Dreaming about love and being in love ... the path from the fantasy to the love story itself ... is just a matter of luck ... or maybe where you find yourself, on the timeline of your own life. Maybe is the perfect time for you to explore what love is about, or maybe other things are important at the moment ... and the love story can only be a future “project”. Exploring what love is about ... in our minds, as a fantasy ... or in the real life, as a ...

Truth be told we want an over night change in our lifes. There are many moments when the actual reality is very difficult to handle and looks like we have no escape at all. We dream of a quatum jump, even if we dont understand the concept very well. In few words, the reality sucks and we dream of a life that we will never have, because deep inside us, we dont really believe we will ever meet this reality. We have a fake attitude that we are looking for change, but this attitude is just a mask for our fears... as them not to be seen. So we wonder today if there is a way of how our lifes can ...

I've wrote many books about love ... being in love, but also hating the concept of love ... and even promised myself that i'll never do that again ... but ... Well ... into one point ... after publishing 20 books of love essays ... i've had a very serious discussion with myself and ... Yes ... i've said it again that i'll not write again about love .... But ... damn it ... i just loved the concept. I loved all related to .... love. And even if i knew that a love story is many times ... illusory ... and might ruin completely our souls ... destroying them forever ... I've continued to write ...

I am writing about sexuality itself, without being afraid or ashamed ... clearly knowing it's actually a way of healing our souls. Many define me as a pervert, or a person who lost his minds long time ago ... having no real chance to recover. But i believe that my journey on all the pathless paths i had experienced ... gave me much more clarity. So ... i just write about it. Defining especially the mix of sexuality and nonsense ... ending up concluding ... it's actually an abstract therapy. Or at least for me it was. And still is. Analysing and defining into my books ... the weirdness ... i...

There are many times in life when we have lots of existential questions inside of our minds. Accepting those thoughts ... and actually embracing them is the path for understanding but also having a normal ... and why not ... also a beautiful life. I personally try to understand those existential questions from the early age of 4 or 5. One of the things that i remember from that time was that i was in the kitchen with my mother and she was explaining me that we live in a world with bad people and i should be aware of that. Maybe if she was telling me that Santa Claus was not real, i would ...

Depression is not … what it looks like. And yes … I would even dare to define it as a … blessing. I started to write the book …. “Depression … the gateway to the real happiness” … trying to understanding the unhappiness from my own soul … but also trying to guide myself to get out from such a mental state. I saw depression lots of times … all around myself … somehow being afraid of it … but also realizing it is not …. what it looks like. Today …. analyzing my own case …. I realize it is a signal … that says we were unhappy …. for too many days into the row....

Have you even asked yourself why so many people in this world are living an unhappy life?! But what about you?! Are you a happy person ... or not?! And if not ... have you ever thought why?! Is just a simple question, same as you would ask yourself why you don’t know skying ... if you never took lessons for that?! You see ... truth be told ... in school we’ve learnt lots of things, including complicated math formulas, languages that we will never use in life, chemistry issues that will not serve us with nothing etc etc ... but no one ever bothered to teach us at least a short list with ...

Spiritual garbage is not something … bad. Negativity had never the purpose to hurt or … ruin us. It was never like that … and will never have that purpose. I’ve accepted … and even embraced all my negative experiences from my life. Today i see them as elements which were revealing me … the truth about the illusion of life. Without the “nightmares” … i could never understand… that all is an … illusion. But … yes … maybe even being happy is … illusory. Never forget that … all it’s an illusion. And don’t pretend anymore that you don’t know it …. or that ...

I've always failed in love relationships ... ending up overwhelmed of lots of weird negative emotions ... not knowing what to do anymore. But still hoping. Illusory hoping. Almost never being able to disconnect ... leave that lady ... and continue my life. Yeah ... i just couldn't. That is how ... trapped into this prisons with invisible walls ... the love stories i was writing about so, so much ... it all ended as an obsession for understanding the nonsense behind relationship man-woman. Writing so much. ... not necessarily being clear ... or even by contrary ... being confusing. So ... ...

Analyse, Define, Re-define Are you looking for a better life, one that is more fulfilling? It is often that we look for answers, answers on how to achieve this – answers relating to different themes – subject matters about health, work, relationships, friendships, passion; also themes of emotions such as love, hate, anger, joy, frustration, and happiness. I understand your search for a better life, and your desire to understand how to achieve this in the complex world we live in. Could you have a better life right here and now? The answer is yes! Questions that you should be asking ...

Telling that the life itself it’s an illusion, might sound so damn … weird … and most probably … even like a depressive thought. But … you see … there are so, so many moments in life when the life itself just… sucks … and we ask ourselves … what the hell have i done that i deserve that?! And that was the moment when the karmic idea came into my mind … starting to believe that all the lessons of life, sometimes very difficult to handle … could be defined as karmic. All those abstract situations … which totally annoy us … and make our lives miserable… are repeating...

Identifying the illusion is not enough. But smiling is sometimes the only … option. You see … when we connect to people, we also connect to their inner worlds. And we see so, so many ideas, emotions, perceptions … such a large spectrum … that we don’t really understand most of the times. Sometimes … we ignore them. Sometimes .. we connect to those universes .. believing they are real and we somehow become part of them. No one ever told us … that we don’t have to believe that something is … real. We could simple look at the image from the front of our eyes … just as we ...

I felt sick. Intoxicated. Poisoned. And all was related with this illusory story which i pathetically defined so, so often ... in more than 75 books with essays ... as the love story of my life. Doing it ... repeatedly. So often ... that i believe someone should come and stop me. Forbidden me to write. All being about the inner illusory worlds ... and my journey in darkness. This darkness which she induced to me ... so often that she made me suffer of a sickness which i could not understand. A spiritual sickness. One difficult to be ... healed. So ... yes ... i write and write. She's close ...